Purge Session

Today was a rough one. Even the atmosphere was set perfectly for the sheet of dark uneasiness that was to follow. Dreary was my heart all last night. Perhaps it explains the unexplained tears from last night, as I lay alone in the darkness of my bedroom, praying for God to strengthen me in my time of weakness. And I was made stronger. Not quite delivered, but patched up. And then, there was today; the day I learned what “murdered’ felt like for those related. It sends your head up into a spin at the first sound. It feels like you’re in one of those twilight zones, where everything is surreal. Then it moves to your heart. My heart began to pound as if I’d just run a 5k and my breath was lost somewhere around 2k. And before you know it, your eyes begin to water before your brain can even remember why. Then you ask yourself, “Why? Is this real? I must be dreaming.”
So you pinch yourself to determine your sanity and to clarify nightmare from reality. But after the sting, you find that reality has become your nightmare, and there’s nothing you can do about it. That’s what “murder” does to you. And now, it’s stuck in my mind like the bullet through his head. And the sad part is, I never even knew him. But I know her, and it hurts to see her like that.